Things That Go Bump in the Night and More Tales from the Platform

So I was planning to write a glorious blog about how great of a time I had in Munich, and how pretty the city is etc. etc. Then last night happened. So I bought a DeutscheBahn ticket from Munich to Bern, Switzerland right? This would be just like the Hamburg to Munich train, where I got to sleep in a little compartment and stay on the same train the whole time right? Well, being the dumbs I didn't check whether or not there were stopovers on this train. In fact there were four. I asked the ticket office before I left if anything could be changed, and they said not really: "There's no overnight trains to Switzerland" the lady said. Glad I knew that before! So I get on the Train in Munich headed for Ulm. It lasts a half hour, and I easily make the next connection train to Friedrickshaven. The train to F'haven pulled in at 12:43 AM. The next train for Schaffhausen didn't leave until 4:36 AM. This could go one of two ways: either F'haven was a larger town and had a nice big station with a 24 hour McDonald's or BK (as many of the stations do), or it could be a small station with nothing open. Unfortunately it was the latter. I got off the train at F'haven nervous, not knowing what to expect. I chatted with another English speaking tourist going to find her hotel. She wished me luck as I headed toward the McDonald's sign. Yes!, the American Embassy (as I call McDonald's) is here too! Oh... it's closed, and doesn't open again until 6 AM. In fact, nothing was open on the platform. Just the creepy video advertisement panel and the self-passport photo booth. So I head in to town, thinking there's got to be some kind of hotel or restaurant open. The first hotel I get to is closing in 10 minutes, and the receptionist couldn't think of anywhere that was open all night "except the lounge." "Oh, a bar" I thought. Not exactly. I walked down a seedy sidestreet toward the "lounge" and found a bar. The restaurant portion was closing, but the barman told me I could sit inside until 3. The bar was this tiny room full of German teenagers and young adults all smoking and assuredly drinking too much. A real safe place. I decided to forego the bar, and ask the barman if anywhere else was open all night (3:00 wouldn't even cover me until my train came). "The TableDance" he said in his thick accent. "What?" I asked. "The Table Dance, you know... the girls." That's when I remembered that prostitution was legal in Germany, and that "lounge" probably wasn't referring to a bar. I got out of there as quick as possible and headed straight back for the train station. There, I weighed my options. The T-moblie phone booth, women's restroom (locked), and the stairwells of a parking garage all seemed like feasible options for waiting. For in fact it was about 25 degrees and snowing. But, I felt even creepier in all of these locations than I did at the bar, so I went back up to the platform. "Someone's got to be up or open in this Godforsaken town" I thought to myself. Then, I saw it: my beacon of hope: the Friedrickshaven police headquarters was located on the train platform. I go over to the door, and see a light on. I knock, and an officer buzzes me into the reception area where I see an enticing bench. "I'm stuck at this train station for 4 hours and was wondering if I could sit inside here." He understood English, but told me that when the police officers go out on rounds, I can't sit in there by myself. He wouldn't even let me sit inside until they left. His best suggestion was to "find a bar and pay them to stay open later." REALLY? IS THAT THE BEST YOU CAN DO POLICE OFFICER? ARE YOU OKAY WITH AN AMERICAN TOURIST DEATH ON YOUR CONSCIENCE???? were all the thoughts in my head, but I politely resigned to sit on the platform outside the office. There I sat, and there I stood. 1 hour. 2 hours. Wow, it's getting really cold. I didn't dare get out my journal or computer, so I just stood, not seeing a soul for hours. When the police came out for their rounds, they completely ignored me. But, this was the safest option I had. I figured that they would at least help me out if I were being murdered... well, maybe not. I bought some Riesen chews at the vending machine - good choice, kept my mind off the cold. 2:45 - less than two hours to go! I see a DeutscheBahn worker coming towards me. He just got there to prepare a train. He looks at me puzzled, and I mime him my predicament (because of course no DeutscheBahn workers speak English - see last blog post). I show him my ticket, and he gives me a sympathetic looks and mimes a shiver. I didn't have to mime back. After a while, I see him waving me over to his train. He asks to see my ticket again (or said something in German anyway), and looks at it for a while. Then, I heard the best words I could possibly hear: "This is train." These golden words meant that he was letting me sit on the train as he got it ready an hour and a half in advance! Danke! Danke! Veilen Dank! Now I felt warm and safe (buy still very sleepy). I bided my time by working on a job application for next year, until I was sure it was actually the train (I didn't trust the language barrier). All's well that ends well, huh? I guess... I made all the rest of my connections, even the 3 minute one (by following a businessman who said he made the same connection every day). Sometimes there are guardian angels out there, if you believe in that kind of stuff. As for me, I'm just living and dying by the will of the German DeutscheBahn. So, two hours of bad trainseat sleep interrupted by unintelligible German and stopovers later, I finally get to Bern. I'm not sure "Have a good night" will ever mean the same thing to me again... ! :)